Service
Addiction recovery coaching
Identity-level recovery work for men whose drinking, porn, gambling or compulsive behaviour has gone past the point of managing it.
Why this work
What this is, in plain language
Most addiction starts as a solution. A drink that softened a feeling. A scroll that quieted a thought. A behaviour that gave a flicker of relief in a life that wasn't quite working. The work I do isn't about willpower. It's about meeting the thing underneath, the part of you that learned, very early, that this is how we survive.
How it works
What the work actually looks like
We work one-to-one, in confidence, over a sustained period. Most clients are already sober, in early recovery, or quietly worried about a habit that has crept past the line. The work blends recovery experience with trauma-informed coaching, so we go below the behaviour to the reason it was needed in the first place.
Who it's for
This work is for
- Men in early recovery from alcohol, drugs, porn or gambling
- Men who got sober and still don't feel like themselves
- Men whose drinking has crept past the line and they know it
- Men whose recovery rooms have taken them as far as rooms can
- Men ready to do the identity-level work twelve-step programmes leave open
What changes
What tends to change
- A sober life that actually feels like a life
- Words for the thing the drink, porn or gambling was for
- Less white-knuckling, more honest steadiness
- Repair, where repair is possible, with the people around you
- A relationship with yourself that isn't built on shame
Frequently asked
Common questions
Do I need to be sober already?
Not necessarily. Some men come to me sober, some are in early recovery, some are still working out whether they have a problem. The work meets you where you are.
Is this instead of AA or another recovery programme?
No. Coaching works well alongside twelve-step or other recovery containers. It's not a replacement for them, and it isn't clinical treatment for substance dependence.
Will my partner be involved?
The work is one-to-one, but the changes you make tend to land in your closest relationships. We can talk about how to bring your partner into the conversation in a way that's honest and not destabilising.
Related writing
Articles on this
Where I work
Local pages
Online across the UK, in-person in and around Canterbury. Find your area below, or see all locations.
More services
Other ways I work
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Newsletter
Letters from the work
Occasional, honest writing on trauma, fatherhood and recovery. No funnels, no sales sequences. One email when there is something worth saying.
Your email stays private. Unsubscribe any time.
Between sessions
Where the work continues
Included with coaching
The Coaching Portal
Every client gets access to the Coaching Portal, a private space for session prep, reflections, progress and resources between our meetings.
What you can expect
Honesty about what this is — and what it isn't.
What coaching here is
The work itself
- A confidential one-to-one space for the things you don't say out loud.
- Trauma-informed, body-aware, paced for nervous-system safety.
- Practical — built around the change you actually want.
- Held by years of work alongside men in addiction, prison, homelessness and recovery.
What it isn't
The lines I won't blur
- Not therapy or counselling, and not a substitute for clinical care.
- Not legal advice, and not representation in court.
- Not a quick fix, a guru, or a programme that promises a fixed outcome.
- Not a place where you'll be judged, shamed, or sold something you don't need.
Transparent pricing. No hidden fees, no upsells. Every option, what it includes and what it costs, is published.
See pricing →About the author
Jaymes Cadby
Trauma-informed coach for men, working out of East Kent and online across the UK. Jaymes writes from a combination of lived experience and years of one-to-one work with men navigating childhood trauma, addiction recovery, fatherhood, separation and the long road back to themselves.
Take the next quiet step.
A free, 20-minute discovery call. No script. No pressure. Just a chance to feel whether this work is the right fit for you.